Saturday, February 12, 2011

Life in the box

Recently I was in a conversation with someone who asked me when I was going to just act like a normal person. She wanted to know when I was going to think and do what everyone else does. My answer to her was that she should not waste her time waiting for that to happen. I am not an inside the box thinker-- in fact almost none of my thinking is inside the box. It goes against my nature-- I would not be truly being myself if I lived my life inside the box of how most everyone else does things.

I am a full time therapist who also homeschools my children, cooks from scratch, does not find shopping recreational, is working toward becoming debt free, my family is building a business and are taking a familypreneur approach,. We eat at the table almost every night, we make sure we have good family time and limit our outside activities to accomplish that family time. We believe that children are to be not only parented, but discipled by their parents. We do not use credit cards (we don't even have a credit card) and if we can not pay cash for it then we don't buy it. May be one of the things that gets me seen as strange more than anything else is that I plan to quit my job once the family business can pay the bills and be home full time with my children. I believe in the traditional roles of husband as provider and wife as homemaker as well as mother to the kids. Then there are my parenting ideas. I believe that the parents should meet the relational needs of their kids, that kids should actually get to have a childhood instead of having to grow up so fast. That it is the job of the parents to actually take care of their children and not just making sure they are taken care of. I believe that parents should be the ones that teach their children the value system of the family-- even if it not politically correct. I also believe it is the parents job to make sure their kids get an education whether they are homeschooled, go to private or public school and not the job of the school.

Those are just a few of the things we do that might be against the norm of society. There are some other things that would be considered different in other places we have lived, but would not be considered abnormal here in Jasper County. Things like hanging our clothes out to dry when the weather permits or not using our air conditioner, but opening the windows instead. Also gardening, canning, and taking our own trash to the dump instead of hiring a service to do it for us.

Life inside the box seems so confining to me. I also think that if we confine ourselves to life inside the box then we become "of the world". Jesus told us to be in the world, but not of it. I truly do not feel I could live the life God is calling me to live if I lived life inside the box. One of the benefits I find is that there is peace in my heart and peace in my home living outside the box. We lived inside the box and were miserable. Now we are happy.

One of the draw backs to life outside the box (to some anyway) is that there is criticism. Often times others offer their opinions about what you are doing wether you asked for their opinion or not. Vic and I have learned to just say "Thanks for the input." It seems obsurd to me that many of these people think they actually get a vote in how we live our life. Then there are the looks others give when they just can not understand why you would choose to save for a big purchase instead of finance it or that we would rather start a business than work for someone else. The biggest thing I get strange looks for is the fact that I plan to quit my job when our family is finally able for me to.

I often here things like this-- in today's society a family has to have two incomes to make a living. My answers is that it depends on what you think you have to have. If you want a large home, weekend shopping for entertainment, fancy vacations, go out to eat a lot, and big cars then yes you do need two incomes to live. Those are not goals for my family.

Evaluate for yourself. If you think that life in the box is right then by all means you can live that way, but my family will continue to live outside the box.

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