Caleb's Baptism

As I stay up late tonight with the oven on-- a cold night called for some baking, but if I had realized how long this project was going to take I would have abandoned it. Anyway, I realize that I never did post about Caleb getting baptized.

Caleb's journey to being baptized on October 2,2011. I will go back to the year 2004 and Caleb was a tiny baby. I was a part of a prayer group and we started praying for Caleb to not only accept Christ at a young age, but to give his whole life to the Lord young as well. Project ahead a few years. Caleb is 5 and he keeps telling his dad and I that he wants to ask Jesus into his heart. We listened, but did not think he was ready. Then one Sunday at church Caleb told me we needed to talk. He told me that he asked Jesus in his heart in his bed a couple of nights ago and that he was going to follow Jesus no matter what his dad and I said he was not too young to decide this. Caleb was five almost six then. Over the course of the next year Caleb continued to tell us he wanted to be baptized. At first Vic and I did not think Caleb had an understanding about baptism and he did not seem to gain that understanding when we explained it to him. Eventually I could see that Caleb did understand and was ready, but Vic did not think he was ready.

Our church started an AWANA program this year. As Caleb started to do the work for AWANA it became obvious that Caleb did understand and was ready for Baptism. So we talked with Pastor and scheduled the baptism. Here are some pictures. I hope you enjoy them.

Biblical Submission in Marriage

I remember as a child the word submission being a not very highly thought of word. That never really hindered my life all that much until after I got married. Sure there were some experiences, but once I left home to start my own life I did not think about submission much. Then when I was getting married I realized that I really did not know what it means for a wife to submit to her husband. I have received various answers ranging from "Wives submitting to their husbands was a cultural concept that applied back in biblical times, but does not apply now." to "It means he has the final say." to "It means he decides everything in your life and you do not get to decide anything and you need to be happy that way." Various extremes to say the least. None of these answers were helpful to answer my question. I still am not sure I can totally define "wives submit to your husbands" with a definite definition.

I have seen various extremes like I mentioned earlier. There are many out there who take the attitude of "I am woman hear me roar" and say "there is no man--not even my husband who is going to tell me what to do". Many of these women who complain about their husbands being without backbone or push overs. Not something I wanted to emulate.

Then there were those who didn't plan the grocery list until their husband approved the menu. In this family the husband is the dictator making all family decisions and his wife's input was disregarded if she ever dared to give it. She had no rights and it seems no voice. That was not what I want to emulate either and thankfully I am not married to a man who would want that.

Somewhere in the middle needs to lie the answer. However, those two extremes leave a lot of possibilities. So it does not show what the husband/wife relationship is supposed to look like. The reason for this is that I think it is something that must be worked out between the husband and wife. The Bible is quite clear that the husband is head of the household, the leader. The wife is to submit to his authority. However, that set up is not going to look the same at my house as it will in your house. I believe the Lord gave us the guideline, but not the blueprint. The Lord knew that each of us is different-- after all he created us. So He knew that each of us has different strengths and weaknesses. Therefore the rolls in this regard were not defined in detail so as to let the couple work them out in their own marriages.

One of the reasons that submission has such a negative connotation is the way it has been overly defined in some cases. I know of a case where a man moved the girlfriends he was cheating on his wife with, but she better never say anything because she is to submit to her husband. I also know of another family that expected their adult daughter to live at home until she got married, but then they would not approve of any man for her. She was eventually considered a rebel because she snuck all of her things out of the house to go get married. She is happily married today. Then there are other families who are set up as the husband is the king while the rest of the family are surfs there to serve the king. It is this extreme that I believe has pushed many women to the extreme of "I will not submit to any man."

It is this extreme husband as king while the rest of us are surfs here to serve the king that I want to talk about today. There are several problems with this and it is not a correct interpretation of the passage that tells wives to submit to their husbands. If you look further in this passage it says that husbands are to love their wives as Christ loved the church and to lay down their lives for their wives. Often in the family with "the king" this part of the passage is overlooked. If he were laying down his life for his wife then the rest of the family would not be surfs to serve him. He would serve them. Still the service to each other is not the answer to Biblical family life. The problem with "the king" concept is that it puts the husband as the center of the family. No where in the Bible does it say the husband is to be the center of the family. This is a form of idolatry. It puts him in place of where the Lord Jesus should be. So she worships her husband instead of the Lord.

Please follow me for a minute. The Bible is clear that he is the head and she is to submit, but that does not make him the center of the family. The center of the Biblically healthy family is Christ. Wives don't live to please their husbands and husbands don't live to please their wives. They each live to please Christ. If she lives to please Christ then she will submit to her husband and if he lives to please Christ then he will love her as Christ loved the church and lay down his life for her. This is the example I want my children to see is a mom and dad who love Christ first and then love each other. Then they will see more truly how love works and my prayer is will pass this on to their wives when they are husbands one day. So the answer to my question in what it means to submit to my husband was simple-- live to please Christ and I will naturally submit to my husband.

Settling down

This week has been a little bit rough, but settling. I ended last week by catching a summer cold. It has been a rough one and I am struggling to get rid of it. I am improving, but it still lingers. It seems anytime I go through a de-stressing time I get sick.

However, I do not want to forget how blessed I am to have the chance to stay home to raise my children. I know there are many who would trade places with me in a heart beat. It has been nice to see progress in the things I am trying to teach the boys. One of the goals that I have is to raise Caleb and Simeon to be uncommonly courteous. I realize that I need to become more courteous as I am working with them on this. Well, Caleb did an excellent job with this uncommon courtesy this week. My family orders food from a coop or food buying club as does my mother. We typically pick up all of our orders at the same time. In the past Vic did this because I was at work. However, now that I am home with the boys I did this job on Wednesday. While I was writing the check I asked Caleb to pick up a couple of the boxes to put them in the trunk of the car. He picked up those boxes, but then proceeded to pick up all the boxes that were not too heavy for him. Then when we went to my mom's apartment he carried the ones that were not too heavy all by himself without being asked. He did this with a cheerful heart and was happy to do it. I was pleased with his courteousness. I have several goals for Simeon specifically. The one top on my priority list is for him to finally be potty trained. He is four and a half and has the ability, but has stubbornly refused. That is Simeon's personality-- you are not going to make him to anything he does not want to do. There are some definite advantages in the long run in his life that this strong will is going to bring him, but as for parenting him that strong will makes the job more difficult. I praise the Lord for his strong will though because I know God has great plans for this quality in Simeon. Anyway, back to potty training. Today Simeon pooped in the potty for the first time. We were all so excited and Simeon got excited about it too. So hopefully we are on the right track.

Vic is busy mowing and carpet cleaning a lot. We hardly see him this time of year. He leaves between 7 and 7:30 in the morning and often does not return until 9:00 at night. We will likely see too much of him in the winter. However, we are praying about what the Lord wants us to do with the winter. We know God has a plan and we want to cooperate with it.

As for me I am catching up and will be for quite some time. Tonight's task is baking for the next week or so.

Have a Happy Father's Day!!!!!!

Busy Totally Blessed Week

We have had a busy totally blessed week here at the Vanderhoof House. Vic has been busy working and is tired, but it looks like he might get a chance to have a little rest this weekend (of course that depends on how many of our activities he plans to participate in). This was Vacation Bible School Week at our church First Baptist Newton. Caleb was at VBS on Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday, then he went to Cub Scout Day Camp Thursday and Friday. Yesterday, Caleb went with Pop-Pop (my dad) to camp and it was reported that he shot a bow and arrow for the first time, made a pirate patch, went swimming, learned a little about map navigation, and I am sure there is more I have not heard about. Today I think they are planning a nature walk, learning to shoot bb guns, and I can't wait to hear about these things and the others things they will be doing. Simeon had a doctor appointment Monday morning to have ears checked after getting tubes 2 months ago. Doctor says they look good. Then he was at VBS the rest of the week and had some special one on one time with me.

This year in VBS the theme was Inside Out and Upside Down on Main Street and the children were taught about character qualities. The first day was gratitude, the second day was compassion, the third day was forgiveness, the fourth day was grace, and today was faithfulness. One of the biggest highlights of the week was the offering at VBS. This year the offering went to the tornado victims in Joplin, MO. Kelli lead the group in singing and the openings and closings. She is totally gifted at this and loves VBS (it shows that she does too). Kelli told the group on the first day that if they raised $300 then a name would be drawn on the last day and that person could throw a pie in her face. Well, on day 4 the total was over $750. So Kelli decided that someone from every class could throw a pie in her face on the last day. Then she further challenged that if they raised $1000 by the end if day 5 a name would be drawn and that child would throw a pie in Kelli's face during the VBS program Sunday night. Those children came through and the grand total for their VBS offering to go to Joplin, MO tornado relief was over $1000. So Kelli got pies in her face today as well as the teacher from the class that raised the most money which was Brooke's class. These are some good times. The program will be Sunday night. Caleb had the camera at Cub Scout Camp so I did not get pictures, but I will get some pictures Sunday Night.

This weekend will continue with our busy schedule (which is due to slow down starting next week). Caleb will go fishing with Cub Scouts on Saturday, there is a swimming party with the Cub Scouts on Sunday afternoon, and then the VBS program Sunday evening.

As for me I helped with the babies during VBS, but today have a summer cold. My husband is taking me out tonight so I have to get better soon.

I hope for you and your family a wonderful blessed weekend and coming week.

Memorial Day Weekend

Actually the past 4 days have been really full. Saturday we went to the Strawberry Patch-- unfortunately I forgot the camera so our next trip will have pictures. Then I rearranged the room we have school in to correct an issue we were having. Then on Sunday we had church, Vic had to finish clearing out a tree so we went to the Newton Aquatic Center to go swimming. Then on Monday we planted more in our garden, I washed 5 loads of laundry, and we had friends over for a cookout. I was on call for the last time and am glad for the pager was quiet. We were dog sitting the past week and enjoyed time with Hershey. Then today I went to work as a therapist for the last time, conducted my final counseling sessions, and now am officially a Stay-At-Home, Homeschooling Mom. Now to top it all off we are waiting for my sister to finish delivering Baby Peyton. We are all so anxious at our house to see some pictures of Baby Peyton.

Pinewood Derby

This morning was the Pinewood Derby. Caleb's car didn't win the race for speed, but he did get a blue ribbon for having the most decals. Caleb had a terrific time decorating his car and he had a wonderful time participating in the derby. We are already talking about next year's car.

I have had difficulty getting pictures to load here in the past, but I guess I have it figured out now. The profile picture on this blog was taken in October, 2009 and this one was taken on January 1, 2011. It is amazing to see how much my boys have grown in the last 2 years. It seems like they grow up so fast. I am afraid to blink because the next thing I know they will be in college or getting married or having children of their own. Time goes so quickly.

family weekend

I am going to attempt to be a more faithful blogger. I had a training seminar on Victor's birthday in St. Louis. Vic decided he would take a day or two away from working and the family would come along. Vic and the boys went to the zoo while I attended my seminar. They had a terrific time. Then we went to Union Station and back to the hotel for some sleep. Then this morning we went to St. Charles. I really enjoyed looking in all the little shops, Simeon enjoyed riding the trolley, Caleb became entranced by the expedition of Lewis and Clark. Vic seemed to just enjoy all of us being together and some much needed time off-- he was over due.

Is it time for dinner?

Yesterday Caleb approached me and said, "Mommy, I like it when you sit next to me when we have dinner." It absolutely melted my heart. I told him that I liked to sit next to him too.

Later that day it occurred to me what a lost art family dinnertime has become. One of the questions I ask in my substance abuse assessments is how did your family eat dinner when you were a child. I have only had one say their family sat down together to eat. It is sad how many families put food on a plate and eat in the livingroom in front of the television. No family conversation, no laughing at each others jokes, no learning about each others day, no prayer time before the meal, no stories, so much is missed by not eating together as a family. That is not to say there are not times to do it differently than this-- we occasionally spread a blanket on the floor in the livingroom and have a carpet picnic for supper as a family. We usually watch a movie we rented.


The family in our country is crumbling and our country can not survive if it is not restored. It is not a matter of if our country will be destroyed it is a matter of when if the family structure is not restored. It amazes me how many times parents easily give up their influence over their children by handing it to someone else. Now I am not proposing that family meals will fix everything wrong with our nation or our society, but I am saying it is one way a parent can start to reclaim their rightful place of influence over their children. Ask Caleb he will tell you that family table means so much to him so he tells me how much he likes to sit next to me. Don't miss those precious moments with your child.

Relieving Cabin Fever

Vic preached this morning and we decided to relieve cabin fever by going to McDonalds in Mattoon to take advantage of the indoor Playland. Then we went to the "mall" in Mattoon. Mall is in quotes since the mall in Mattoon is not much of a mall, but it did get us out of the house. We came home to discover that my brother-in-law's grandfather went on to be with the Lord this morning. Harold lived a full life and is now enjoying his rewards in heaven.

We took down the Christmas Tree and now Caleb is painting his derby car for the AWANA derby this coming Friday. I am sure there will be pictures to come in the future. Later we will go to Bible Study.